Friend Level 1 vs Friend Level 2

I realized a while back that there are two kinds of friends.  Actually, there are three kind of friends.  I knew of two before last night, but I learned about new one and probably the most important one.

Friend Level #1:
These are your best friends. They are fucking awesome.  Nothing can come between you guys.  You pee/poop/shower together and its awesome.

Friend Level #3:
You're friends but none of you really loves the other one.  It's more of a social nicety.  You like each other, but you're not best friends.  You all know it and there's no lost love because of it.

Here comes the tricky one.  The one that causes all the problems.

Friend Level #2:
These are the friends that, for a moment, replace Friend #1.  When Friend #1 is at a different bar, is out of town, or is just being a douche, Friend #2 is the shit! They're awesome.  They're jokes are hilarious!  Their beards are immaculate!  Their pizzas have the perfect amount of cheese and sauce.  Their style is impeccable.  BUT!!!!!  When Friend #1 is back in town, Friend #2 gets a swift kick in the junk and a reminder of his/her place.   Friend #2 gets sent away like he's Buddy the Elf being sent away by James Caan down to the mail room.  It's like if you're Friend #2, no one even wants to answer your phone calls. "Buddy the Elf, what's your favorite color?"