We Win. You Don't.

So this past weekend, my friends and I competed in the Beer Olympics.  My team consisted of Me, Ryan Pierce, Evan Olesh, Parker Knox, and Lauren Corcoran.  There were 9 teams competed across 6 events.  In those 6 events, my team finished 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 1st, and 2nd.  Now, I know what you're thinking.  "Adam, you said 6 events but there are only 5 results there."  Good work! That's very astute of you.  The reason there is only 5 event results is because our team was winning by so much that they didn't even bother with the 6th event.  That's right.  They just said, "Here's your fucking trophy, get out."   Maybe not that mean, but no one seemed to be happy about us winning.  Maybe because we dominated, maybe because we hounded every ref and judge to make sure it was fair, maybe because we had been drinking for 12 hours and were obnoxiously drunk.  Who knows!

Here are some of the highlights from the BOs

• Some guy with long hair (I know, right?) tried to fight me for dancing during beruit.
• We played Ninja Rap by Vanilla Ice and the TMNT TV theme song about 25 times. (No one was very happy about that.)
• There was someone there named Luigi.
• Roberta (Anyone know her last name?)
• Some guy almost went face first into a fire during dizzy bat. 

Bottom Line: If you're going to host the beer olympics, just get ready for my team to show up, shit on the competition, and wipe with your hair.  Nuffsed.  (new word?)