What I Do When I Blackout

So the other night, my friends and I went to another friend's apartment with plans to go to a great bar called, Cleary's.  We started drinking and having a good time, chatting it up with long lost friends and eating pita chips and tortilla chips and chocolate covered raisins (love em!)  Anyway, it started getting late, we all started getting drunk, and then someone made the executive decision not to go to the bar and just stay at the apartment.

At first I was a little upset because I love Cleary's and I love dancing and you can dance at Cleary's so it's a great combo for me.  But then I started to get really drunk and so I got happy again.  So I was really drunk and what did I do? I kept drinking until I was black out drunk.

Then I realized, I do the same things every time I black out.  Side note: I only know these things because of stories, pictures and videos that my friends show/tell me because clearly I don't remember what I do when I'm black out.

• Dance - I always dance when I'm blackout.  Even if no one else is dancing.  Even if there is no music being played. I'm gonna dance, especially if there is a banana near me, as proven by this picture.

 

• Magic - That's right, I don't care what you think, I do magic.  And if I'm super drunk, I screw up most of my tricks yet I'm sure I still think it's impressive.  And finally, if I'm really really drunk, I'll teach my tricks to other people so they realize just how crazy my magic skills are.  Pathetic, I know. Shut up.
• Text - This usually gets me into trouble, but sometimes I just have glorious moments and text things that no one will ever understand.  Like this one: "Clearly i am an unstoppable lyrical force laid upon shallow graves that I hope the beats contained within give way to the god layin/dow his blazenous sword."  What the fuck does that mean?  No one will ever know.

I'm sure I do a lot more than that, but I'm yet to get confirmation from my friends about it so next time you see a pattern forming during my blackouts, you better let me know.